Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
please come you make the beer taste better
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
