Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
