I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
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