Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
