I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
