either way he was missing a nipple.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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