ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
