Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
