If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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