Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
