I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
