They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
no. you can't hotbox the world.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize
