i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Randomize