their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
