Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
