think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
