Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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