right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize