What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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