i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Randomize
