waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
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