Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Randomize
