I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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