guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Your topless pictures make me question reality
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Randomize
