And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
