Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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