Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize