I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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