Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
