so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I didn't shave. On purpose
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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