I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
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