? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Randomize
