every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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