you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
