I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize