Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
