well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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