I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I want a musical about memes.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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