Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize