rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
