What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize