Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
