): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
