Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
she told me i tasted like america
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
