Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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