Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize