I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Randomize
