party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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