Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
