I heard we made out
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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